![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pirateygoodnessNnnghsljflj you guys, Legend of the Seeker. It's like they noticed I was watching, and just decided to RATCHET UP THE HOMOSEXUAL OVERTONES. Literally, this ish gets gayer every week and I am DYING OF JOY.
Seriously, How Is This Show Even Real?
A LotS 2.08 Picspam of Only the Gay Awesome Parts
Inexplicably, this week Kahlan has gone from flowy white dresses and neutral makeup to SEXY CORSET AND THIGH HIGH BOOTS AND CLUB EYELINER. Possibly she just wants to dress more like her girlfriend, IDK? I have mixed feelings about it - mostly, I have decided my issue is with the makeup. The boots can stay. Even if they have got to be giving her some chafing issues on that horse.
Anyway, some stuff happens, which - whatever, it's related to the plot, for which you should watch the episode, but THE UPSHOT IS that Richard wants his FABULOUS BODYGUARD FRIEND CARA to go off with his best GF Kahlan and find their other friend, Zedd, who got kidnapped. There's this whole bit, where Cara's all "Yeah, it's good that you're leaving, we're better without you anyway." And like, I think we're supposed to read it as bravado because she's secretly going to miss him? It - IDK. It works a couple ways.
Also, Kahlan kisses Richard goodbye, because in the Midlands it is totally cool to have both a girlfriend AND a boyfriend at the same time. I - really just like it when she kisses things.
So anyway, everyone's favourite ladies are bickering in the forest later, and all of a sudden THIS HAPPENS. It is better as a gif, but BASICALLY CARA'S REFLEXES ARE NO MATCH FOR THE LAWS OF PHYSICS. OR ARCHERY. OR THIS CREW OF VERY ANGRY MEN WITH SWORDS.
Don't worry though. They're on the case. Except that, as they SLAUGHTER AN ENTIRE LEGION OF SOLDIERS TOGETHER, LIKE SOME KIND OF DREAM TEAM OF DEATH, Kahlan gets cut just above her thigh-high boots. For once, it is a flesh wound on this show that's actually a flesh wound. Afterwards, though, when Cara asksif it was good for her how she is, she tries to play things cool. They're still in the stage where they're trying to impress each other.
Later that night, though,when it's dark and romantic, Kahlan's sexy thigh wound is apparently infected. She tries to make Cara go on without her, and Cara is like, OH WAIT. WE CAN CAUTERIZE IT. THAT WILL SOLVE OUR ISSUES. And not only can Cara cauterize it, she can do so WITH HER MAGIC DILDO AGIEL.
You see where this is going.
(Note: This is the worst field medicine EVER and it's killing me, who fucking fact-checks this show. BACTERIA + BURNS = OTP, don't ever do this. EVER.)
Anyway. They have a discussion about it, in which Cara gives her Agielsex eyes many significant looks. Because it will hurt. And IDK if you guys have noticed, but Cara gets sort of excited when things are about to hurt.
Kahlan's still down, though, because she's badass.
SO ANYWAY, HERE IS WHAT HAPPENS NEXT. Cara kneels in front of Kahlan, and then stares at her and looks INAPPROPRIATELY AROUSED while she tends to Kahlan's woundif you know what I mean. Because she ♥s pain and it's ADORABLE.
And then she tells Kahlan that she's impressed at how much she can take. Kahlan's like, "Yeah, I get that a lot."
And then Kahlan passes out. THIS IS ACTUALLY WHAT HAPPENS. I AM NOT EXAGGERATING A SINGLE BIT OF THIS SCENE. IT IS AMAZING AND I URGE YOU TO RUN, NOT WALK TO SOMEWHERE THAT WILL LET YOU WATCH IT IF YOU HAVE NOT ALREADY.
So anyway, a while later, they come to their friend's corpse. As viewers, it has already been explained to us that this is a Clever Ruse, but Kahlan is pretty sad. AND THEN NLGKL;FSF OH MY GOD. CARA MAKES THESE FACES, YOU GUYS. THESE LITTLE CUTE FACES, where she is very much not sad but UNDERSTANDS THAT KAHLAN IS SAD AND KEEPS LOOKING TO HER FOR CUES? It makes my heart all squishy. Also, Kahlan is grateful that she makes an effort, which is even SWEETER, nngklfds.
The next morning, Cara tries to get Kahlan to stop exerting herself and aggravating hertotally more infected recently cleaned sexy thigh wound, and it is possibly the cutest thing in the world. She tries asking, and then she tries using reverse psychology and pretending that she's tired, and it is totally unclear which of those is true because she's TOTALLY PSYCHOTIC, and it's adorable. Even Kahlan thinks it's adorable. Like, in a weird way.
Oh and then they find their friend the wizard, and everything's great. Except that Kahlan is still full of ~a sense of loss~ and serious emotions. Thankfully, Cara is there to watch her back.
THE END.
Inexplicably, this week Kahlan has gone from flowy white dresses and neutral makeup to SEXY CORSET AND THIGH HIGH BOOTS AND CLUB EYELINER. Possibly she just wants to dress more like her girlfriend, IDK? I have mixed feelings about it - mostly, I have decided my issue is with the makeup. The boots can stay. Even if they have got to be giving her some chafing issues on that horse.
Anyway, some stuff happens, which - whatever, it's related to the plot, for which you should watch the episode, but THE UPSHOT IS that Richard wants his FABULOUS BODYGUARD FRIEND CARA to go off with his best GF Kahlan and find their other friend, Zedd, who got kidnapped. There's this whole bit, where Cara's all "Yeah, it's good that you're leaving, we're better without you anyway." And like, I think we're supposed to read it as bravado because she's secretly going to miss him? It - IDK. It works a couple ways.
Also, Kahlan kisses Richard goodbye, because in the Midlands it is totally cool to have both a girlfriend AND a boyfriend at the same time. I - really just like it when she kisses things.
So anyway, everyone's favourite ladies are bickering in the forest later, and all of a sudden THIS HAPPENS. It is better as a gif, but BASICALLY CARA'S REFLEXES ARE NO MATCH FOR THE LAWS OF PHYSICS. OR ARCHERY. OR THIS CREW OF VERY ANGRY MEN WITH SWORDS.
Don't worry though. They're on the case. Except that, as they SLAUGHTER AN ENTIRE LEGION OF SOLDIERS TOGETHER, LIKE SOME KIND OF DREAM TEAM OF DEATH, Kahlan gets cut just above her thigh-high boots. For once, it is a flesh wound on this show that's actually a flesh wound. Afterwards, though, when Cara asks
Later that night, though,
You see where this is going.
(Note: This is the worst field medicine EVER and it's killing me, who fucking fact-checks this show. BACTERIA + BURNS = OTP, don't ever do this. EVER.)
Anyway. They have a discussion about it, in which Cara gives her Agiel
Kahlan's still down, though, because she's badass.
SO ANYWAY, HERE IS WHAT HAPPENS NEXT. Cara kneels in front of Kahlan, and then stares at her and looks INAPPROPRIATELY AROUSED while she tends to Kahlan's wound
And then she tells Kahlan that she's impressed at how much she can take. Kahlan's like, "Yeah, I get that a lot."
And then Kahlan passes out. THIS IS ACTUALLY WHAT HAPPENS. I AM NOT EXAGGERATING A SINGLE BIT OF THIS SCENE. IT IS AMAZING AND I URGE YOU TO RUN, NOT WALK TO SOMEWHERE THAT WILL LET YOU WATCH IT IF YOU HAVE NOT ALREADY.
So anyway, a while later, they come to their friend's corpse. As viewers, it has already been explained to us that this is a Clever Ruse, but Kahlan is pretty sad. AND THEN NLGKL;FSF OH MY GOD. CARA MAKES THESE FACES, YOU GUYS. THESE LITTLE CUTE FACES, where she is very much not sad but UNDERSTANDS THAT KAHLAN IS SAD AND KEEPS LOOKING TO HER FOR CUES? It makes my heart all squishy. Also, Kahlan is grateful that she makes an effort, which is even SWEETER, nngklfds.
The next morning, Cara tries to get Kahlan to stop exerting herself and aggravating her
Oh and then they find their friend the wizard, and everything's great. Except that Kahlan is still full of ~a sense of loss~ and serious emotions. Thankfully, Cara is there to watch her back.
THE END.
