pirateygoodness

I've obtained copies of the entire Sword of Truth series - ie, the series that Legend of the Seeker, the awesome kickass TV show of rad chicks making out and punching shit - is based on. The books seem to be less rad.

I plan to post book excerpts under the cuts, for the purpose of gentle mockery and lighthearted discussion. These will always be posted with warnings - there is, I have been told, some non-con in the books, and that will be warned for extensively, as will anything else I quote that I feel is particularly problematic and/or triggery.

Today's quotes are about Goodkind's ridiculous ways of describing emotion. He. . .is either not very articulate, or has never really done a lot of emoting in his life, because Richard and Kahlan seem to respond to most upsetting life experiences with one of the following: tears, vomiting, or RIGHTEOUS AND UNCONTROLLABLE MURDEROUS RAGE.

Wizard's First Rule, by Terry Goodkind, p108-109, 120-121
Warnings: oh my god the worst fucking writing. Also, anger.
( As if in a trance, Richard grasped the hilt )

DISCLAIMER: THIS IS FOR FUN. I'M REALLY REALLY SORRY IF YOU THINK THE BOOKS ARE THE BEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD. JUST KIDDING, ETC ETC.